How to become a Millionaire

I don’t know why so many people are obsessed with becoming millionaires – or of those who already are, with becoming billionaires. I don’t get the point of collecting more wealth than you can spend.

But oddly enough, without striving for it, I have developed a fool-proof plan to become a millionaire. As I am rather opposed to material wealth, I am not going to implement it myself, but I will generously share it with all of you. But be warned that becoming a millionaire will not make you happy! – I can see you don’t believe me…

So here’s the 5-step plan:

  1. You need an initial investment of around 999$(US). If you don’t have that, you’ll have to work for a month or sell your car.
  2. Buy a ticket to Vietnam. Depending from where you start, this will cost you between 100$ and 900$. 
  3. After you arrive, you buy a can of Coke or a banana and pay with a 50$-note.
  4. You will get a bit more than 1,000,000 Vietnamese dong in return. Plus the Coke or the banana, of course.
  5. Now you are happy because you are a millionaire.

Vietnamese Dong currency

In step 6, you will realize what a silly, shallow and pointless goal you had set yourself. Depending on your personal level of wisdom, the time between step 5 and step 6 may vary from 30 seconds to 30 years. The same applies to the time that is required to recognize the deeper meaning behind this article. Some will die without getting it.

About Andreas Moser

Travelling the world and writing about it. I have degrees in law and philosophy, but I'd much rather be a journalist, a spy or a hobo.
This entry was posted in Economics, Travel and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

21 Responses to How to become a Millionaire

  1. I used to say that I wanted to be a millionaire, everybody else wanted it and I figured it would be the best thing. Money! I quickly got away from that though. The happiest people seem to have the least amount of things.

    I just left my job to pursue a nomadic lifestyle where I can write freely, work on my photography and work odd and end jobs as I move. Definitely won’t be making much of anything, but I’ll be happy doing it : )

    • That sounds absolutely great!
      I also feel much more free since I got rid of all this stuff and the stress that comes with having to maintain it. Property seems to be a big stone tied to one’s leg. I don’t need that.

    • Mal Ta says:

      well done Pablo for doing this. but i’m sure that you have something to go back to if things go wrong… like your parents house/insurance. and i’m sure you didn’t start your adventure with no money at all in your account. am i right?

      • Most of us have parents to go back to, but that does not diminish the adventure. Quite the contrary, it’s a reason to go out and do it!
        As a fellow traveller whom I hosted in Vilnius once told me after riding around Europe on a bicycle for a year after giving up his job as an engineer to do so: “What’s the worst that could happen to me? If I can’t travel anymore, I will have to return to live with people who love me and who will cook for me every day.”

      • Mal Ta says:

        wish i can do it as well. however, my job requires practice and practice makes perfect (literacy and being child friendly while hating children). stopping the voluntary work i do will also effect me badly since stopping will effect badly the other vols and their work (we’r few people and we depend on each other to keep the organisation going)

      • It sounds like you are a good person doing good things! What organisation is that?

      • Mal Ta says:

        stray animals

      • If you get rid of the dogs, you’ll have more time, resources and care for other animals. :-)

      • In a sense, yes. I don’t come from money at all, everything’s been self earned. If I do luck out somewhere and run out of money, I won’t have a flight back, I’ll have to work my way out of it. If I manage to make my way home then I can stay at my mom’s house, but if I work my way out of it, I’d just keep moving up.

        I’m actually not starting with much money at all. If I’m careful, maybe 5-6 months worth of money in a 3rd world country. I’ll be working for my room and building up my readership and earning from my blog and photography (hopefully)!

        Even when I was planning to leave, it wasn’t based on saving tons of money, just enough to get out and find my own way through other countries and cultures : )

  2. german by blood says:

    I would rather have money since it give you more status and freedom to speak , If Snowden was the billionaire owner of his company and spoke out about it they wouldn’t be going after him like they are, and if your rich enough you can hire people to carry the stone tied to that leg!

  3. List of X says:

    Thank you, but I already have a 100 Trillion dollar bill from Zimbabwe. I’m set for life.

  4. Kavita Joshi says:

    good post with a sense of humor….I have also written about the habit of hoarding money in my post – http://talkingexperience.wordpress.com/2013/05/28/is-money-more-important-than-happiness/
    Have a look if you havn’t already :)

  5. ugnius says:

    Hi, Andreas,

    I found you via your comment on vice article about drug users conference in Vilnius :) I hope you enjoy the beautiful summer in Vilnius :) If you ever run out of places to visit around Vilnius let me now :)

    Now about the money. I really admire entrepreneurs like Elon Musk. If you want to create something its always good to have few billions. Look what great disruptions he is causing. Thats just better for all of us. I guess what I am trying to say is that I suppose at the end of a day one should not forget what his real dreams are. Whats beyond that million? If I want to create something and on the way I get to earn some (or whole bunch of) money – thats even better :)

    Thats just few thoughts of young inexperienced student. Andreas, do you really think that big money and more important things in one’s life are mutually exclusive?

    Best wishes from Vilnija :) Geriausi linkėjimai iš Vilnijos :)

  6. Erika says:

    Haha, that’s not what I was expecting at all! :) Creative!

  7. Lelala says:

    Nice idea :-)
    Heck, if its that easy, why not everybody is doing it? :-)))

    • Because if everybody was a millionaire, then everybody would want to become a billionaire. Once everybody is a billionaire, everybody would want to become a trillionaire.
      And so on.
      Except for the few people who realise that it is not necessary to measure oneself against others.

  8. Kyra says:

    There was a U.S. study a while back (my vagueness here means I can’t remember which study, how far back, or where I read it)… anyway, it found that the “happiest” Americans were those of us who earned between $50k-75k total household income. In other words, earning anything beyond that did not bring additional happiness or satisfaction.
    As a middle-class citizen of a first world country, I often wonder about the ethical and moral implications of investing (and for that matter, saving) in general. What I mean by that is, worldwide, it seems that we as a global society look down upon the “hoarding” of significant wealth. Yet, those of us who identify as “middle class-and-above” First World citizens are bombarded with warnings to make sure we save enough, invest well, for ourselves and the future of our children (this is an issue at least in the U.S. anyway).
    Yet, in a world in which so many live on less than a few dollars (USD) a day, and children die of starvation every day… doesn’t every attempt to invest and save really amount to some version of “hoarding wealth”? In other words, for those of us who are in a position to save or invest for situations that may or may not occur years or decades down the line… is it more ethical and prudent to save as much as we can, or is the more ethical path to save little and to GIVE all that we can? Hm. Food for thought.

  9. Ex-Vermieter says:

    “Except for the few people who realise that it is not necessary to measure oneself against others.”
    This kind of “measurement” unvariably leads to competition; what mankind needs instead is cooperation!

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